Perks Magazine
An exploration of sex, sexuality and little bits of life
The Perky Jouney
The Perky journey began back in 2010 with a little blog called Rhonda Perky’s Bits.
In my early 30s, married and divorced, from horny to frigid and back again, I began to delve into my experiences with friendship, love, lust, and everything in between.
My blog was a place to document my reflections and shifting perspectives on social norms such as monogamy and kink, and my experiences navigating the interpersonal.
A few years on, having enrolled to study sexology and sexual health, I expanded the blog to encompass feature articles, essays, and observations, and launched Perks Magazine.
I hope my journey inspires you to reflect and explore.
With love, Rhonda xx
Latest posts
How to Have Free Fetish Phone Calls Online
Fetish phone calls are a safe, anonymous way for individuals to explore their fantasies and desires. But how do you have a successful fetish phone call?
Erotic Pop Art
From D-Rex vs Triceracocks to Mr. Bearbottom, Christopher Adam Gray shares his whimsical exploration of sex positive concepts and figurative art with Perks Magazine.
Not my circus, not my monkeys
Rhonda reflects on the many ways she has taken on responsibility that never belonged to her.
I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?
Rhonda answers the question: ‘I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?’
My sex life
Rhonda reflects on the role sex plays in life (or doesn’t) and the struggles many women face (re)connecting with their sex life.
On consent: pushing past ‘no’ isn’t a victory
Rhonda explores the nuances of consent and what happens when we are socialised to defer to the needs of others or to push past no.
Why I chose not to have children
Rhonda explores the grief around her choice not to have children, from societal pressures, childhood trauma, and the state of the world today.
The pitfalls of making friends as a grownup
Rhonda faces some of the pitfalls of making friends as an adult and what can happen when one friend needs the company of the other more.
Under the covers…
Relation-ships
Kink
Single
Life
Sex
Your Stories
Sexuality
Perky Leigh
Porn
Ask Rhonda
Editorial
Perky’s Bits
Reviews
In conversation with sex coach Liv Bryant
Ever wondered what it’s like being a sex coach? I chat to sex coach Liv Bryant of Tell Me Darling to find out.
69 ways to balance cats on your breasts
Carl Skase offers you the listicle to end all listicles: 69 ways to balance cats on your breasts. Or, a tribute to what the internet does best!
Body image: when ‘perfection’ isn’t enough
Rhonda explores her toxic relationship with body image, attachment to self-criticism, and aversion to self-acceptance.
Why I’m not buying ‘Instagram star’ Essena O’Neill’s rage quit from social media
Essena O’Neill may be weeping her carefully crafted ‘this is REAL’ and ‘I’m doing it for my 12-year-old-self’ story all over her website, but she is also asking you and me to send her money now that she has to make a living like the rest of us.
Sacred sexuality: sex-negativity in spiritual clothing?
When I think of sacred sexuality (or Tantra), it sets off my bullshit meter. I picture caftans and communes, or people publicly displaying a kind of seventies big-bush sexuality that feels particularly unsexy to me. Is this sex-negativity in spirituality’s clothing? Or is something else going on?
Mass shootings: disaffected young men or entitled objectification?
A response to Jim Dowd’s ‘The Shootings Are Not Senseless’.
Rope Sensei: your one-stop rope shop
Want to explore the pleasures of playing with rope? Rope Sensei has got your back.
Sex toys: dos and don’ts
Thinking of buying a sex toy? Victoria from Passionfruit The Sensuality Shop talks sex toys, the sex toy industry, and how to find the right fit for you.
Blurred Lines – what is cheating to you?
Within non-monogamy, what does cheating mean anyway? Tessa shares her story.
Feel the fear
From the blog: Rhonda Perky learns a tough lesson in feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
A square peg in a round hole
Rhonda struggles to define what ‘relationship’ might mean while still exploring her sexuality.
Memory — The Self as an Unreliable Narrator
In Part Two of this exploration of self-image, projection, and the ego-defences, Rhonda explores the unreliability of memory.
Misguided protectiveness, slut-shaming or internalised paternalism?
Rhonda Perky examines how everyday paternalism shifts accountability, and asks: ‘What makes us uncomfortable? Whose behaviour is really the problem? Where does the accountability lie?’
The power in sex
Does sex necessarily involve power? Not just Domination and submission, but non-BDSM sex? Rhonda Perky explores questions of power and privilege inherent in sex.
What does a word weigh?
‘Rape’? Rhonda Perky reflects on the weight of words in how we conceptualise our experiences.
Unravelling jealousy
Rhonda reveals her struggle with jealousy and what it means to hold on by letting go.
Abuse is a choice
Rhonda Perky shares her reflections on ending up in an abusive relationship and how she eventually walked away, and the questions this raises for our society.
‘Nobody buys flowers for the porn-pile girl’
Rhonda Perky goes under the covers to discover what it means to be a Modern Slut.
Tantra: get ready to try this at home
‘Why do to your man what he can do to himself?’ This week I ventured into the erotic world of Tantric massage.
Passionfruit: A sex shop with a difference
Think if you’ve seen one sex shop you’ve seen them all? Look again. Michelle Temminghoff talks about what makes Passionfruit The Sensuality Shop in Melbourne, Australia, more than just an adult store.
Casual sex: doing it without doing dinner
Rhonda offers her advice on negotiating casual sex.
Married Sex – A fairytale in three parts
Rhonda reflects on the rise and fall of desire in a long term relationship.
Choke Me, Spit On Me, I’m a Feminist — Part One
Clarissa-Jan Lim explores the history of feminism and its views on BDSM.
The friendship destroyer
Rhonda learns a lesson in why some friendships are best left behind.
How to Have Free Fetish Phone Calls Online
Fetish phone calls are a safe, anonymous way for individuals to explore their fantasies and desires. But how do you have a successful fetish phone call?
Sex toys: dos and don’ts
Thinking of buying a sex toy? Victoria from Passionfruit The Sensuality Shop talks sex toys, the sex toy industry, and how to find the right fit for you.
My boyfriend has transgender friends – does he want to be with one again?
Rhonda answers the question: ‘My boyfriend has transgender friends on his profile. I was wondering if he wants to be with one again?’
I’m in love with someone in an open relationship, what should I do?
Is it worth pursuing love when your lover is in an open relationship with someone else?
More than friends: is it worth the risk?
Rhonda helps a Clueless Canadian decide whether it is worth risking friendship to pursue a short-term non-monogamous relationship.
Can a long distance D/s relationship work?
Rhonda answers your question, can a long distance D/s relationship work, and isn’t it all just sexting anyway?
Turns out my guy has a girlfriend. He won’t tell her about me. Should I?
Rhonda Perky answers your question: The guy I’m seeing has a girlfriend and won’t tell her about me. Should I?
Unrequited love, or ‘don’t bump uglies with your housemate’
Rhonda counsels a reader on navigating his relationship with a jealous housemate.
I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?
Rhonda answers the question: ‘I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?’
My girlfriend agreed to an open relationship… until I wanted to act on it
Rhonda Perky answers your question: My girlfriend agreed to an open relationship… until I wanted to act on it. What should I do?
I’m an extremely horny person. Should I cheat or ask for an open relationship?
Rhonda’s advice on what an extremely horny person in a monogamous relationship should do.